When I was still a boyfriend, I didn’t mind doing cooking and house chores to impress my wife when she visited. After all she was going to pay back in full when we get married by serving me totally because I will be the MAN OF THE HOUSE.
Quietly I had built this idea in my head and even imagined scenarios of how she would serve me. I had also imagined scenarios of how I would react if she didn’t do things a certain way. I had built this huge expectation in my mind of how I would need to be treated as a husband
In all these fantasies I rarely pictured myself serving as I had done to impress her. I felt I would need to be rewarded for all the good I had invested in the relationship. Marriage would be my harvest and I would only serve her as a reward for serving me. It was all about me
Few months before we got married I came across a Bible verse, Luke 12:37 that stated “… I tell you the truth, he himself (Jesus) will seat them, put on an apron, and serve them as they sit and eat!” As simple is it sounds, it blew my mind and left me in tears.
I realised that even Christ, served us completely and at his coming, he will put on an apron, get his hands dirty and serve us. If I am to love this woman as Christ loved the church, I could not do anything less than to serve her and our home totally without expectations.
I got into marriage with a desire to serve my wife completely without expectations. To completely give my all and support her in cooking and chores as she always knew me to do as a boyfriend. I have gladly done so ever since and still doing that.
Interestingly, my service to her has made her to treat me right consistently even more than the expectations I had built up in my head. It’s as though each time I serve her, she naturally responds by trying to outdo my service. It’s like a healthy contest of service to each other.
We are growing to become two people used to giving our 100% to each other and not meeting each other halfway. When something comes up that needs to be done, it’s done naturally because we are both committed to serving each other completely
I have come to realise that there is such a thing as the MAN OF THE HOUSE, but it’s not the man who lords over his wife or family like a dictator.
A MAN OF THE HOUSE is the man who is committed to serving his home completely. He is a Servant-Leader
Author: Damilola Praiseworth – @Depraiz